Navigating The End of Life Journey
Understanding Physical Changes, Emotional Detachment, and Peaceful Transitions
🌑 A Culture That Fears What It Cannot Control
We live in a world that talks about everything—except death.
In a system that measures success by how long we can delay the inevitable, we’ve lost touch with the sacredness of life’s final chapter.
As a nurse who’s walked both the sterile corridors of the ICU and the quiet, holy stillness of hospice rooms, I’ve seen firsthand the vast difference between a death that’s feared, and one that’s honored.
We’ve become a culture that resuscitates the body long after the spirit has begun to let go. That rushes to prolong life without asking if what we’re preserving still feels like living.
But death is not failure.
Death is not defeat.
Death is not the opposite of life—it’s the completion of it.
And when we understand the journey—emotionally, spiritually, and physically—we can meet it not with fear, but with reverence.
🕊️ The Sacred Detachment Process
One of the most profound aspects of dying is detachment.
It often begins days, sometimes even weeks, before physical death.
The person begins to withdraw—at first emotionally, then physically, and eventually spiritually. They may seem less interested in conversation. They might stop asking for food or drink. They may sleep more, or stare off into the distance.
This isn’t depression or confusion—it’s a divine process.
The body knows.
The spirit knows.
They are beginning to release attachments to the material world:
→ To routines, to roles, to identities, and eventually—to relationships.
→ You may see them talk to loved ones who have already passed, reach upward with soft hands, or smile at something invisible to the rest of us.
This is not something to be fixed.
It’s something to be honored.
The detachment process allows the soul to cross the threshold gently. And our job is not to call them back—it’s to walk them as far as we can… and then release them in love.
✨ The Nurse as Death Midwife
In our training, we’re taught to preserve life at all costs.
But what I’ve come to believe is that nurses aren’t just life-savers.
We are gatekeepers.
We are witnesses.
We are midwives to death.
Just as a midwife prepares the body to deliver life into the world, we prepare the soul to return home.
In Hospice, we aren’t just managing symptoms—we’re creating space.
We lower the lights. We silence the alarms. We speak gently. We listen without judgment.
We understand that this is not a medical event—it’s a spiritual one.
🩺 What Families Should Expect Physically
Understanding the signs of impending death can help bring peace to families who otherwise feel helpless or afraid.
Here’s what may occur in the final days and hours:
Changes in breathing: Shallow or irregular breaths, long pauses, or Cheyne-Stokes patterns are common
Decreased appetite and fluid intake: The body is conserving energy. Forcing intake can cause more harm than good
Cool extremities / mottled skin: Blood circulation shifts inward
Increased sleeping / unresponsiveness: Hearing often remains, even when the person appears unresponsive
Terminal secretions ("death rattle"): A natural result of lost swallowing reflex—not usually distressing to the patient
This is not failure. It’s not suffering. It’s the body’s sacred choreography as it prepares to let go.
🌧️ Wet Death vs. Dry Death
In hospice care, we often describe two types of dying trajectories:
A wet death often follows aggressive interventions, feeding tubes, fluid overload, or poorly managed symptoms. It can involve visible discomfort, terminal agitation, or active distress.
A dry death, by contrast, is typically gentler—marked by stillness, soft breath, and a natural withdrawal.
While not every outcome is in our hands, early hospice referral and conscious decision-making can make all the difference. The sooner we honor the dying process, the more peaceful the transition becomes.
🙏 Creating Sacred Space
If someone you love is approaching the end of life, here are ways to offer presence:
Play soft music or worship
Dim the lights and use natural scents like frankincense or lavender
Hold their hand. Sit beside them in silence
Offer loving words: “I love you. You can go. We’ll be okay.”
Let go of fear—it does not serve them
Do not interrupt the detachment. Walk with them… and let them go
🌿 Peaceful Transitions vs. Chaotic Departures: A Nurse's Reckoning
There’s a stark contrast between the way people die in the ICU and the way they pass under the care of Hospice.
In the ICU, I witnessed death surrounded by panic.
Bright lights. Alarms. Rushed compressions. Barked orders.
We worked with urgency, but often in futility—prolonging the inevitable, sometimes even causing pain in the process.
I’ve cracked ribs during CPR.
I’ve seen patients shocked multiple times with no meaningful return.
I’ve watched families pressured into last-minute decisions they barely understood.
And I’ve held my breath as someone was intubated while still awake, their terrified eyes locked on mine, pleading for answers I could not give.
This is not death with dignity.
This is medicalized chaos.
And it left scars—not just on the patients and their families, but on the nurses, too.
That said—when there is a viable opportunity for survival, especially in the case of a young or otherwise healthy patient, we should absolutely do everything in our power to preserve life.
And when it is the patient’s or the family’s wish to pursue every effort, we honor that fully.
We fight alongside them.
We advocate fiercely for their care.
Because the decision to continue aggressive treatment is not ours to make—it belongs to the patient, and to the people who love them.
What we wish, more than anything, is that there were more education, understanding, and acceptance of the sacred nature of the dying process—so that patients and families could make truly informed decisions, not ones driven by fear, guilt, or pressure from a system that too often sees death as failure.
Because when the time comes to surrender—not out of defeat, but with peace—something holy happens.
When I entered Hospice, everything shifted.
I witnessed peaceful transitions—souls slipping away with quiet dignity, often with soft music playing, scripture being read, and hands held by those who loved them.
I saw tears—but not panic.
I saw grief—but also gratitude.
I saw families gathered around, not to say goodbye in a moment of trauma, but to release their loved one into eternity with reverence and prayer.
Peaceful death is not rare—it is possible.
But it requires us to let go of control.
To choose presence over procedure.
To trust that death is not a moment to fear—it’s a moment to hold sacred.
🕯️ Death is Not the End—It’s a Homecoming
At Remnant Healthcare, we are called to walk with families through this final chapter—not as clinicians alone, but as sacred witnesses.
We offer education, advocacy, and spiritual support so no one walks this road alone—or in fear.
If you need help understanding hospice, setting boundaries with providers, or honoring the dying process from a faith-based perspective, we are here to serve.
📍 Learn more: RemnantHealthcare.org
“Death is not the opposite of life—it’s the exhale of a soul returning home. When we meet it with reverence, we become part of something holy.”
— Kimberly Overton, BSN, RN, BC-FMP
Founder, Remnant Healthcare
About The Author:
Kimberly Overton, BSN, RN, BC-FMP, is a Registered Nurse, entrepreneur, and fierce advocate for medical freedom and informed consent. With a background in critical care and acute patient management, she bore witness to the systemic failures of a healthcare system corrupted by profit-driven protocols—protocols that led to medical murders disguised as care. During the COVID-19 pandemic, Kimberly made the bold decision to resign from traditional bedside nursing, standing in protest against coercive mandates, the unethical use of Remdesivir, and the rollout of dangerous, ineffective COVID “vaccines.” This defining moment propelled her to establish Nurse Freedom Network, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit dedicated to empowering nurses, safeguarding patient rights, and exposing corruption within the healthcare system. Expanding on her mission, she launched Remnant Healthcare, providing holistic, patient-centered alternatives that honor medical autonomy, informed consent, and compassionate care. As host of Nurses Out Loud, Kimberly amplifies the movement for healthcare reform, medical freedom, and the unwavering defense of human dignity. Originally from Boston, Massachusetts, and now residing in Hendersonville, Tennessee, her mission is to disrupt the broken system, hold the profiteers accountable, and reclaim healthcare on a foundation of truth, ethics, and respect for human life—restoring humanity to the healing profession.
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This is beautiful. I have seen patients who should have been in hospice care long before they go to the hospital. Unfortunately most of the population has no idea what hospice is and how it can help. Better education about hospice is much needed. Thanks for this information.
So beautifully written. Profound really. Thank you Kimberly.